FAVE RANDOM TWEET August 18th

FAVE RANDOM TWEET OF AUGUST 18th

youropera

This is not an actual single tweet, that so inspires Sir Twitalot today, but rather what the Royal Opera in England is doing.

They are creating an opera based on tweets submitted by the public, a twitter written opera, 140 characters at a time.

TWITTER OPERA

Sure, it reeks of opportunism and publicity hunting, but it is also a great way to involve us modern folks with our hip hop ears and our shoe-gazing guitars to get involved in a form of music that used to be the pop of its day.


CHECK OUT THE OPERA BLOG TO FIND OUT MORE ABOUT IT.

Bravo UK Opera!

You are our fave random tweet of the day!

Fave Random Tweet August 17th

Fave Random Tweet August 17

Marquis426

I HATE TWITTER MORE THAN A FAT BITCH ON A TREADMILL!

You know, Sir Twitalot has been noticing the hate for Twitter's problems and limitations lately, and there is a lot of twitter hate as well as love on tweets.

Just go to search.twitter.com and type in "hate twitter" and you will see.

But most of it is pretty run of the mill tweets, nothing special or graphic, nothing like el tweeto of marquis426 above.

He hates twitter in a very odd way.

Why would he be hatin' on an overweight woman who is working out, attempting to get thinner, and healthier, one would ask?

• Unless Marquis426 is a chubby chaser.
• Unless she is taking up time on a treadmill that he wanted to get on and work out himself?
• Unless he has a fierce dislike of Jell-O and she reminds him of that dessert?

Sir Twitalot does not know, but he does know this is the most interesting Twitter Hate Tweet he has seen today, so it is his fave.

Keep on hatin in a lovable way, Marquis426!

Why bother Tweeting?

Sometimes I wonder what good is twitter really, besides protesting in absentia in Iran?

A blogger bitches about it. A valuable read, I believe.


WHY HE DOESN'T USE TWITTER

Twitter Lawsuit Watch - Number 1

Twitter figured they would get sued for copyright infringement because everyone has similar ideas,
and here is the first one -


FROM TECH RADIUM
which is the self-proclaimed industry leader in Mass Notification
(i thought that was lady who makes the Schedule for the local Catholic Church.)


TechRadium, Inc. provides a mass notification and emergency alerting systems to governmental, educational, commercial and non-profit entities.


TECH CRUNCH ARTICLE ON TECH RADIUM LAWSUIT

fave random tweet August 15

fave random tweet August 15

kirrilyfred

Listen, strange women lyin' in ponds distributin' swords is no basis for a system of government.


Sir Twitalot found this gem of a fave random tweet in the southern hemisphere.

A perfect fit for August 15th, this reference to the Arthurian legends as well as to all strange women who lay down and give out weapons in modern days, like Lady 9mmGlockenspiel, or the Dame Kalashnikov, is a nice late summer, or late winter bit of whimsy of a tweet by kirrilyfred.

Given the 24-7 news cycle of non-stop blathering, with pundits pontificating about nothing, it's nice to get a tweet about the roots of the problem. Should our leaders be chosen by metaphorical ladies in a lake? Methinks not. It should be done on the golf course or pool table.

On the other hand, maybe it would yield better leaders than we've have the last few decades.

Either way, we hope kirrilyfred keeps on tweetin'. Those who are chosen for fave random tweet of the day are mystical and powerful themselves!

Fave Random Tweet August 14th

Fave Random Tweet August 14th

sedruce

My hair smells awesome. I rubbed a couple drops of exotic verbina essential oil in my dreads to counter any lingering acid vapor smells.


Sometimes the mundane becomes glorious, in both a tweet and life.
So says Sir Twitalot.

Hooray sedruce for taking what is usually a boring tweet - someone talking about their grooming and appearance - "My hair smells awesome." and bringing it to the next level.

Although dreadlock care is not on Sir Twitalot's grooming list, he does have a half brother with a bit of dreadlock stink.

But it isn't the hint of drops of verbina oil (though I believe verbina is spelled verbena) that rocks this tweet, it is the countering of "lingering acid vapor smells."

Who amongst us, having walked about the living dead, the vampiric chemists, those who would set oil wells on fire, or dissolve body parts in sulfuric acid, has not had to contend with acid vapor odors in our hair?

Who, Sir Twitalot asks, has not wanted to run and hide at a high school dance because the stench of acid vapors was stronger than our carnation or corsage, thus causing the self-loathing others to attack us so that they might hide their own insecurities?

That is why this is our fave random tweet of the day, for it's Martha Stewartian approach to the travails of our modern era, where so much of life has a lingering acid vapor smell...

Bravo Sedruce. Keep on tweeting and oiling the dreads

Fave Random Tweet August 13th

Fave Random Tweet August 13th

Budiyan

Shithole! About time you knocked this fuckin shit out!


From Singapore comes our fave random tweet of the day from a fellow named Budiyan

Sir twitalot faves this tweet today because it is just delirious and we have no idea who it is addressed to and what it is about.

Is Budiyan angry at himself - getting on himself to get some work done?
Or is he angry at someone he calls Shithole!
Is he exasperated with his own anus, for some lack of opening to allow his feces to exit.
Or is he created lyrics to a new dance song?

We don't know, but his use of the two classic swear words, shit and fuck, in such random and exclamatory ways, makes Budiyan rock the tweet today.

Now everyone, KNOCK YOUR FUCKIN SHIT OUT!

8 lbs. 140 characters - Baby Whelped on Twitter!

CONTRACTIONS OF A DIFFERENT SORT ON TWITTER

Instead of the tweety contractions like can't, don't or musn't - the contractions of labor of wife of CEO of twitter Evan Williams - and the eventual disgorging of his scion from the T1 line that is her birth canal were the tweetin' rage today as Sara Williams tweeted about giving birth, as she did it.

Bravo! Another first for Twitter. In your face, iplacenta! Forget Fetusbook!

But will twitpic provide breastweeting shots?

Fave Random Tweet August 12

Fave Random Tweet August 12

teamruckus1

is Centennial Hills hospital really pimpin their Labor & Delivery facilities? Look bitches I don't want no "Gourmet Celebration Dinner"


Oh Sir Twitalot does love him this random tweet of the day. This is one of those that makes him happy he does this.

This is a tweet from the front lines, peoples! From teamruckus1

You see, there is a new type of mother out there, and they like their delivery to be straight up, no chaser. They know it's war time everywhere, and they don't need no fancy dinner after they pop out the nextgen human. Gots to keep moving, no times for celebratin', who knows when the bombs will be dropping, we gots us some health care reform happening, just give me a cup of juice and some chicken nuggets and I'm taking junior out of here. yo bitches! I don't need no pimpin on my placenta, I can sell that to some botox juicer, keep her young.

If it feels like suddenly we are living in Terminator, but without good internet connections, that is because we are. And teamruckus1 is letting you know Centennial Hills pimps! Save that celebration dinner for some dumb ho living in the pre-Matrix universe.

And epidurals, that shits for minivan mindys and iraq veterans with spinal damage and shit. not teamruckus1, she is showing us the way of the she-wolves of our future in her tweet,
and for that SIR TWITALOT cheers her on! And says thanks for the fave random tweet of the day!

Fave Random Tweet August 11

Fave Random Tweet August 11

Debflom

Banker: "What does Equinox Theatre company do?" Colin: "Soup. Soup is our business."

First off, let Sir Twitalot be clear: I am not a big fan of "jokes" on tweet. And by that I mean sending jokes that you heard somewhere, you know, used bits of humor over and over again.

They are dirty by then, and all you did was forward. Bad tweeting kids.

Second off, let Sir Twitalot be clear again: I am a big fan of sharing bits of absurdity, especially when it reveals a greater insight into our world.

And that is what debflom has done with her fine shared tweet today.

In case you still had a thought in the the back of your head that bankers had some shred of intelligence that they hid away and that was the reason Wall Street crapped, debflom's tweet reminds you to remove that last thought.

Thank you to her and to her friend/lover/brother/son (choose one) Colin, who answered the banker with the most obvious answer available.

Sir Twitalot applauds you Debflom, and reminds you to keep on tweeting!

Now back to work.

bit.ly lasts longer than tr.im

In the world of URL shortening, Twitter basically used bit.ly
and therefore a competitor tr.im could no longer compete,
because like most of us, they needed money to operate.

ARTICLE WHERE TR.IM FOLKS SOUND WHINY

Now some around blame the Denial of Service Attacks for
putting tr.im under and not able to get back up, but others
blame Jetblue and its darn promotions.

Sir Twitalot does not know, but I do know that if you
used tr.im links you may want to re-shorten them puppies.

Fave Random Tweet August 10

Fave Random Tweet Aug 10th

AKDB

...Am now following Hitler on twitter. God i love the internet.

Sir Twitalot loves the internet too, not because he can follow Hitler, but the fact that someone else can and it can mean something entirely different that what following Hitler meant 70 years ago.

AKDB knows what Sir T is talkin bout.

The internet is not about single minded blind devotion, unless of course you've put a hashmark next to Jonasbrothers on twitter.

It's about randomness, exploration, and wasting time at work. It's about a cup of feces being "shared" with your pals. It's about Hitler posting tweets. It's about Russians knocking out facebook to stop a blogger.

It's about Fave Random Tweets, like the one of today

You go AKDB, keep on tweeting!

Was Denial of Service Attack to silence Blogger?

Your Twitter Down? Blame Putin!


RUSSIAN SYMPATHIZERS DON'T LIKE HOTLANTA!


Oops, other Georgia... the one that used to be part of Soviet Union.


PC WORLD Article here !

Fave Random Tweet August 9th

Fave Random Tweet August 9th

jqgill

I have some underwear which is 10 years old & in perfect condition -- it's indestructible! It must be made from same stuff as cockroaches.

Well folks, Sir Twitalot found this fave random tweet today, and it's quite delightful.

Why? 3 potentially big SCIENTIFIC reasons:

The first - The impressive fact that jqgill may very well not have bodily fluids. If these underpantaloons he tweets about are not made of some NASA-based Area 51 product from another galaxy, there is no real reason for them not to have deteriorated to some degree unless jqgill is a medical miracle, and he does not sweat, leak urine, semen, or feces.

And when he walks there is no friction in between his legs.

He is a new breed of human - Neo Sapiens. One who does not have waste products or effect the environment in negative ways. He is the new human we have been waiting for.

The second - He is an alien. He has mistakenly given away his identity in his zeal to blend in by using Twitter. Don't be fooled by the picture!

The third - His boxers or briefs are indeed made of cockroaches or other material. He needs to share their blend with the world. Take a look at what the tag says!

Any way you look at it, he is Sir T's fave random tweet of the day though. Because the supercollider ain't working.

Fave Random Tweet August 8th

Fave Random Tweet August 8

A_Liquid_Sun

I cant stop drinking fresh carrot juice! whats wrong w/me.Not the kind in a container they say is fresh. I mean directly out of the juicer.


There is something so, dare I say, refreshing about A_Liquid_Sun's tweet today on August 8th, Sir Twitalot decided to fave it.

It is not for it's writing style, narrative twists, or poetics. It's not for what it reveals of the human condition, or politics.

It's just our happiness that A_Liquid_Sun is finally admitting that she has an addiction. Acceptance, acknowledgment of your illness is the first step towards healing it.

Perhaps Twitter can be a way for interventions to happen not in hotel rooms, but at health food juice bars, or via iphones. Has there been an app developed for remote interventions?

Meanwhile, we cheer you on A_Liquid_Sun, for you committment to your health as you recover from the beta-carotene dragon you have been chasing.

And thanks for todays Fave Random Tweet!

Biz Stone Interview - Who is Using Twitter & Why?

How are they learning how to monetize and thoughts?

LINK TO BIZ STONE 5 MINUTE INTERVIEW

Simple and easy, growing naturally, instead of insanely.

Fave Random Tweet August 7th

fave random tweet of August 7

QUANTINUUM

Bunny Rabbi

Yes, sometimes small is good. Two Words can be a tweet, and a damn good one at that.

Sir Twitalot tips his cap to Mr or Mrs QUANTINUUM
and his or her simple tweet above.

It says so much AND so little at the same time.

It gives us an image to consider.

Do you see this as a human bipedal with a Rabbit Head
OR
rabbit with curly brown hair coming down from it's ears
and holding a Torah?

Lose a letter, gain a comedic surreal image.
Tweet it or Twee it.

Sir Twitalot says Mazel Tov, Quantinuum!

Fave Random Tweet August 6

Fave Random Tweet August 6

mmcornelius

Twitter is, IMO, somehow less narcissistic than Facebook and MySpace because it's more interaction/conversation and less about me, me, me.


Why is this Sir Twitalot's fave random tweet of the day?

How could it not be, with the encapsulating "me, me, me" at the end. It's the amusing, self-referential twist to the premise that mmcornelius lays out for us.

Whether or not you agree with her assessment of Twitter, and she may be correct, because look at Sir Twitalot, I spend more time analyzing others' tweets than chatting about myself, the fact that she can take an insightful tweet and turn it into a referent of an early Beatles' song is just delightful.

So thanks mmcornelius, we loved your tweet, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Fave Random Tweet August 5

Fave Random Tweet August 5

SmartMouthL

old man with fish net wife beater and extra taco meat on the side, front, and back Do not come over here

Sir Twitalot has faved SmartMouthL's tweet today as the best NOT only because of her descriptive abilities, her use of adjectives and imagery is distinct and clear, like a poster artist, but also because of her use of her mobile phone, the location from where she tweeted, as a quasi-sci fi weapon.

(This a classic wife beater from the Web.)


She does not want the elderly human who is dressed improperly for his age and physique, and who as far as we may know may be drunk, or just disorderly, coming near her. I think many people could relate to this situation.


(Young Glue Huffer in Wife Beater. )


So she tweeted that command on her mobile phone. "Do not come over here!" As if it was a weapon from Star Trek or Star Wars, and she could use her mental or futuristic powers to keep him at bay.

We've all done this at some point in our urban journeys, suburban forays, or rural roamings. Mentally wish that weird guy would stay away from us.

But how many have tweeted that, using the new Apps on the iphone, Crazy Gross Guy Stay From Me!!!

For being a trailblazer, Sir Twitalot salutes you SmartMouthL!


(A wife beater, let loose in the wild.)

Fave Random Tweet August 4

Fave Random Tweet of August 4th

chasegoforth

Glad Clinton was successful. I guess it takes a lying weasel to speak to a lying weasel.


Sir Twitalot is not often focused on the political when it comes to his fave random tweets. Usually the political is either pie-eyed, cynical, fear-filled, or vitriolic and focused on pissing on the supposed opponent.

Rare is the political tweet worthy, in Sir Twitalot's view, of fave-rotism. It gets caught in the lower and cannot rise to the inspired.

So that is why Sir Twitalot is amused to say that chasegoforth's tweet above is our fave of the day.

The twitterer is commenting on the day's news that former Prez Bill Clinton was able to release the two video reporters from Korean custody. This was a nice moment for the husband of the Secretary of State, as their detention was nutty a la mode, and a la Jong-il.

Then chasegoforth puts the zinger in, equating them both as lying weasels.

Why Sir Twitalot enjoys this is not because Sir T is a Clinton hater. He rather enjoyed Clinton because of the Great Blow Job Farce that made Congress show how many hypocrites it had, and the Blue Dress. It was a simpler time; when people cared about the First Semen and where it landed. It was a time for when our national debate over sexual behavior amongst consenting adults was concerned with adultery, as opposed to the present day debate over same sex consensual loving. It was past the time of interracial sex, in the middle of safe sex attitudes, but not where we will be in 20 years, with alien sex and its multi-pronged debate.

Plus, Clinton and his triangulating team kept the crockpot simmering on many of the things that Republicans started with Reagan and first Bush. He was not some evil liberal.

No, why Sir Twitalot enjoys this tweet is because while Former Clinton may be a lying weasel, to reduce Kim Jong-Il to that name is to remove so many of the horrific things he has done over this lifetime. The genocide he has wreaked upon his own people. The self-aggrandizement of himself as a God who lords over other Koreans. His sexy, nuclear blow-dried hair.

Kim Jong-Il is more than a lying weasel. He is the King of Illegal Pet Ferrets.

And that is the magic of Twitter. The ability to rewrite history, no excuse Sir T, the necessity of rewriting history because you only have 140 characters.

So thank you Chasegoforth, for making Sir Twitalot realize that the political tweet can be done well, and yet also see the limitations in it. (Obviously the limitations of congresspeople tweeting was obvious, but that is another tale.)

Get the covert truth about North Korea here.

John Dough - Deep Agent - North Korea - watch more funny videos

Fave Random Tweet August 3

Fave Random Tweet of August 3rd

Mezmereyezz8

Do these girls get paid to be on the show? Like a small stipend or something?

Today's fave random tweet by Mezmereyezz8 is a question we have all asked at one time or another, at least mentally, even if we don't recall asking it.

Do these girls get paid to be on the show?
In the show?
On the stage?

Because it seems like they are being exploited otherwise.

Unless they are attention whores, who have attention deficit disorder.
And then they don't care and they don' remember if they got paid.


Sure, womenfolk get themselves exploited sometimes, and men are miserslutdevils to do it, but they can't help it. There is a history of wet T shirt, pimp hand, seductress sirens, helpless baby boy culture they all fall into.

Can we stop it?

Sir Twitalot doesn't know.
Maybe the pendulum will have to swing back the other way.

Then the tweet would be:

Do these guys get paid to be on the show? Like a small stipend or something?

Of course every guy would say his stipend was not small.

Fave Random Tweet August 2

Fave Random Tweet August 2

keithjoforever

holy crap! I own Flashdance?!


Today's Sunday Fave Random Tweet comes to us from keithjoforever who is astounded by his ownership of early 80's classic popcorn movie, Flashdance.

Sir Twitalot is not certain why Keith is surprised.
Perhaps it is not his taste.
Perhaps he does not remember buying it.
Perhaps he feels that is reveals something about his personality that even he was unaware of.
Is he a fan of girls who both weld and dance?
Is he erotically charged by leg warmers?
Is he a fan of the 1980's perms?

Looking back, the film is from a simpler time.
Written by a simple man of simple tastes, Joe Eszterhas,
starring a young innocent, non-Sapphic Jennifer Beals.
Maybe Keith is surprised he was once innocent and simple
enough to own Flashdance?



In the same way Keith is surprised by items in his DVD collection, Sir Twitalot
is often surprised by the tweets he finds twittering about. Holy Crap! I doth say.

And that is why this is our Fave Random Tweet of August 2

Twitter Sue, Twitter Sue - what's a Realty Company Gonna Do?!

IT IS TRUE.

Woman with less than 20 followers sued
by Realty Company for tweeting about
Mold in her Apartment.

START HERE

Suppose you have bitched about
your landlord not taking care
about a complaint of mold.

But nothing was done.

GO HERE

Suppose you tweet it to your pals on Twitter.
All 17 of your followers.

No biggie for most people.
The tweet disappears, barely noticed.

UNLESS YOU ARE HORIZON REALTY
who proclaims they are a

Sue First, Ask Questions Later Organization

And then you discover what you really are
is lawsuit crazy.

Of course, Chicago is a tough town.
And from what I gather, a moldy town too.

Fave Random Tweet August 1st

Fave Random Tweet August 1

cwizzproduction

man my mom is like extreamly hungover ...meaning me n my bro have 2 do everything 2day!...meaning i have limited time for beat making


Sir Twitalot is loving this random tweet of cwizzproduction
because it has so many narratives flowing in it
that come from all kinds of time streams.

1- Mom is extreamly (sic) hungover.

(What did she do last night? Is she a regular partier? What drove her to drink so much? What is extreme for her hangovers. Does he regret anything she did?)

2 - What exactly do Cwizz and his brother have to do, when he says everything 2day?
(Just cook and clean? Or does his mother run a business they have to take care of?)


3- Cwizz has beat making to do.
(who needs these beats? will the parties be ruined tonight because the beats will be lacking? Has Mama Cwizz made tonight's parties awful because of her Friday night partying?)

Sir Twitalot does not know.
But he does know that Cwizzproduction's frustration made for the fave random tweet of August 1st!

Thanks!

Fave Random Tweet July 31

Fave Random Tweet July 31

Trick_or_tweet

"You're a poopy head!" "I hate you!" With Budweiser in their sippy cups, the Summit in the Sandbox begins at noon.


Sir Twitalot applauds Trick_or_Tweet's tweet today in regard to the Race War with Beer Chaser event at the White House.

As Brevity is the Soul of Wit, so is Brevity the Soul of Tweet, and T or T's summation of the discussion with Obama, Gates, Crowley and Biden as toddlers whining and fighting keeps it brief.

But why this works beyond all the other tweets that Sir Twitalot spied today, is that Brevity requires Reduction, and by reducing these grown men into their young child selves, she reduces the conflict to what it was. A boy playing at professor, tired from traveling, made a stink, like a little boy at a sandbox. A boy being a police officer, got annoyed at being yelled at, so he pulled him out of his sandbox and dragged him to his Clubhouse and embarrassed him. Another boy, who is President of the playground, called the Police Boy a Stupid head.

And now they have to have juice and cookies and make up.

And because, thanks to trick-or-tweet, we can now think of this situation reductio ad absurdum she is our fave random tweet of the day!

Hooray!

Fave Random Tweet July 30

jonathansegura

why's it so difficult to fly to Greenland from NYC?


Sir Twitalot is all about the random tweet, the randomness being part of why he faves a tweet, and jonathansegura's random question, about the issue of traveling to Greenland from the Large Apple, is nicely random. Neither rhetorical, nor fully expecting an answer, is a wonder of wonders. Actually a wonder of exasperations.

Tossed out to the twitaverse. It is a tweet that fulfills our basic conflicts - Man Vs. Travel Agent, Man Vs. Airlines, Man Vs. Sky Icebergs.

Mr. Segura, we don't know why it is so difficult to fly to Greenland from NYC. I would blame it on the Inuits, or one of the Secret Military Bases, or that the ice sheet is melting and there is less and less of Greenland to land the plane on.

Either way, we applaud you Tweet and label it our Fave Random One of the Day.

Fave Random Tweet July 29

Fave Random Tweet July 29

Liquid_squid

Only one more half-hour of Stalin.

Sometimes a tweet is just marvelous for its mere existence.

It can allow for so many meanings to be read into it.

It can create a science fiction scenario.

Imagine this tweet written by someone in 1953 at Stalin's Deathbed.

Somehow they had an iphone sent to them, and they texted this tweet so

we would know the death was occurring.

or they had time travelled themselves to witness his death.

Perhaps the grandson of someone murdered by Stalin who had gone to kill him in revenge.

STALIN'S DEATH -LINK

Or perhaps this is just a modern individual who has a tyrannical nickname

for his boss, and he is alerting his pals that his shift at work is almost over.

Perhaps it is a person with Multiple Personality Disorder

and the personality that is like the genocidal Soviet Leader

is allowed one more half hour before the personality that is more

like Paris Hilton arrives inside their mind and body?

We do not know, but at least liquid_squid knew the amount of time left for Stalin when he or she tweeted this.

Thank you Watery Cephalopod. Keep on Tweeting

Fave Random Tweet July 28

Fave Random Tweet July 28

Jerk500

PUBLIC JERK ANNOUNCEMENT: Whos w/waking up early & knocking on the doors of Jehovah Witnesses 2 get some payback?


Now Sir Twitalot loves him some pranks, and while he is not fond of jerks, this particular jerk, Mr. #500, has some good prank in him. That is why it is our fave random tweet of the day.

Sir T doesn't often think about Jehovah's Witnessi much anymore, they don't frequent the Castle Twitalot much now, but back in the day, he was always amused, confused, and sometimes annoyed by their antics: dressing up like IT workers in a small city in the Midwest, offering comic books of talking wild animals, assuring Sir Twitalot he was going to hell because he wasn't in on the JW secret. Creepy. Like those guys Neo fought in the Matrix.

But a cappucino and a croissant later at a local coffee joint, and Sir Twitalot forgot about them.
Never thought about payback like Jerk500.

But that would be the good idea.
Except those JWs get up really early.
Hard to beat them out of their jammies.
Sir Twitalot suggests we just stay up all night and get their at 3 AM.

But it is a good idea that is clear in 140 characters or less.
Not a lot of good clear ideas - innovative and prankish - are seen in tweets.

So Jerk500, for that, you are Sir Twitalot's Fave Random Tweet of the day.
Tweet on!

Fave Random Tweet July 27

MiDesfileNegro

Spasm over, I think. Misery will return in a minute. Sigh.


Ah, the ailments and physical experiences that people share on Twitter - the twinternet is filled with mucus plugs, diarrhea, flus, broken limbs, tumors and the likes.

It is not over-sharing, Sir Twitalot supposes, but a flattening of the medical profession. If doctors are going to remove the wrong organ, or incorrectly prescribe medication, then we need to share our ailments to hear if there are other diagnoses.

Or perhaps it is because of the TV shows like CSI, House, Farrah Fawcett dying on TV, and Plastic Surgery Shows on Cable. We all like to chat about our bodies and their seeming malfunctions.

However, in midst of all these ailments, sometimes a TWEET shines through, like the one by midesfileNegro's here.

We don't know where the "Spasm" is. Or even if it is physical. Could it be just and emotional spasm - a tear in her heart chakra based on the loss of a beloved?

But even if it is physical - the fact that when it is over, MISERY shall return, and so soon, leads us to wonder what the Spasm was covering?

And the SIGH - the acceptance of pain here - like a great character in a Russian Novel who just assumes that suffering is a burden for most in life - leads us on a path with midesfileNegro.

This tweet is not a be-all, end-all tweet.

It is a moment in time, a slipstream tweet; we can hear the pain, hear the sigh, and allow it to move down the big TWEETRIVER, hoping that one day we will hear that Midesfilenegro will be better.

Tweet out the spasm Girl! Unless they are caused by too much tweeting!

Fave Random Tweet July 26

chuckhemry

just got done jerking off. stuck my finger in my butt for the first time while cumming. i liked it alot!!!

What can Sir Twitalot say?

This is my fave random tweet of the day because it made me laugh.

AND

Because it breaks the narrative storytelling of the tweet similar to how Tarantino worked in his early ouevre. Showing how he arrived at his present moment by revealing the past to then propel us into the future.

We start in the present with Chuckhemry

1 - He got done jerking off.

(Sir T hopes he wiped off before he tweeted.)

2- Flashback into the past - He sticks his finger into his butt while cumming.

3- He leads us into the future. He mentions that he liked it alot. Suggesting that he will be doing it again and again. And hopefully tweeting about it.

In this manner, Chuckhemry rises above the pure pornographic, beyond the exhibitionistic diary, into a tweet that is emotional, deep, mind-expanding.

He causes us all to look at the barriers we put up in our lives, and why, and demands that we become courageous and live beyond the fear.

Sir Twitalot commends you Chuckhemry! Keep on tweeting it and loving it!

Fave Random Tweet July 25

JustMarlon

Mexican guy walking thru my neighborhood doesn't belong here..its not about race..its about mixing that plaid shirt w/ those plaid shorts


Sir Twitalot's fave random tweet today comes from fashion icon JustMarlon.

Actually, Sir Twitalot doesn't know if JM is a fashion icon but why Sir T faves his tweet is because 1) while it does a classic piece of tweetin' - that of the bagging on other peoples' style, or lack thereof, it also is 2) topical, given our issues with Henry Louis Gates Jr, the policeman, and the President and the media blathering about it. JustMarlon does this by making sure to eliminate the racial undertones or overtones.

JustMarlon's note... between ellipses... that it is not about race is the striped tie over those ooogly plaids!










Sir Twitalot wonders if it had been a Scottish Guy in a kilt, the natural skin tone and personality built for plaids, if JustMarlon would've tweeted the same thing.










OR

Sir Twitalot wonders if JustMarlon lives in a highly fashionable anti-plaid neighborhood, and that is why the plaid non-matcher does not belong there.

We don't know, but we do know that JustMarlon is sensitive to poor dressing, no matter what race or religion, so he is fash-ist, not a racist, just like Sir Twitalot is sensitive to poor tweeting, making me a tweetist.

And that is why we commend JustMarlon for his tweet! What's next for JustMarlon? We think a new cable show - "What Not to Wear... in my neighborhood!"

Sir Twitalot sings Baby Got Tweet!

Sir Mixalot? Nope, Sir Twitalot.

"Baby Got Tweet"

I like big tweets and I can not lie
You other twitters can't deny
That when a girl types in from an itty bitty cell
And tweetdeck hits and rings it’s bell
You get sprung, wanna shake your mouse
'Cause you notice her 140 filled da house

Deep in the Net she's tweeting
I'm hooked even though it’s fleeting

Oh baby, I wanna tweet wit’cha
And twitpic your picture
My followers tried to warn me
But that tweet you sent makes me horny

Ooh, Rump-o'-tweet-tah!

You say you wanna lick my feet? Ahhh.
You’re a Heater, a Cheetah
you ain't no average tweet-ah!

I've seen office girls bendin’
To hell with facebook friendin’!
She's sweet, in da seat,
She’ll “follow” you right in the street!

I'm tired of tech reviewers
Sayin' flat tweets are right for you

Take any kinda man and ask him that
She gotta tweet big from front to back!

So, Twitters! (Yeah!) Twitters! (Yeah!)
Has your girlfriend got her apps? (Hell yeah!)
Then Tell 'em to tweet ya! Tweet ya!
Shake that healthy Tweet!
Baby got Tweet!

Fave Random Tweet July 24

Today's Fave Random Tweet is actually NOT a tweet from one person but
a hash tag

#onlyindahood

This trendy trending topic is being tweeted by people in da hood filling it up with descriptive images of the life that happens on in some of our "less gated" communities here in the the Dis-united States of America.

While I cannot say I have lived smackdab in da hood, I have spent my time there, in various cities - NYC and LA primarily - and worked there, so I enjoy the tweets that are posting as the tweetsfromdahood are making fun both of the ghettofab attitudes, fashions, and the ridicu-lous situations that happen due to hip-hopcrisy of residents, police, church deacons and the likes. The difference between hispanic and black hoods is also tweeted upon.

To put it bluntly, this shit is funny.
And the fact that the folks posting have a sense of humor about it just makes you laugh

I am not going to make a list of the LOL's - there are TOO MANY.

Every community in the US needs to find their shit funny.
If only I could get my middle class suburban church going neighbors here to poke fun at their minivans, lawns, basketball hoop in every driveway life style. Now that would not make them laugh.

Sir Twitalot - THANK YOU EVERYONE WHO IS POSTING IN #onlyindahood

Fave Random Tweet July 23

SamanthaSaverky

I hate you, no really. You're a 16 year old, idiotic, "punk rock", douchebag. You'll be trapped in this town forever


Sir Twitalot is super happy that SamanthaSaverky is our fave random tweet today.

Because she uses Twitter for one of its magical purposes --- Letting people know who they are and where they stand and where they may of may not be going.

Venting.

Sure, we see a lot of tweets where people rip on each other, but they usually do it with the "@" symbol and they are replying specifically to some idiotic "punk rock" douchebag. So it becomes more of an internal back and forth between two IPRD's.


But when you just tweet it and let it flow into the Twitterverse, then it's like a spite balloon you let float away.

And yes, we all know that Judge Not, Lest Ye Be Judged. But sometimes you just need to let it out. And it's fun to let it out with an anonymous tweet.

Samantha knows who she speaks of, but we can only add photos to guess.


You go Samantha. Let the kid know where they are headed. In a world of emo scenesters and people imitating an actual rock moment of over 30 years ago, it is a sad world. The douchebaggery needs to end. And you need new friends.

Tweet on. Sir Twitalot Approves.

420 in 140 - a good tweeter to follow

Sir Twitalot, for the record, is not a pot smoker. Hasn't been for many years.
But he doesn't mind pot smokers.
They seem like nice sorts.

Certainly nicer than drunks.

Sir T has no problem with what was once called "tea" being decriminalized.

Because it is just a plant. You don't need to process it to make it into something else.
No fermentation etc.
So that leads Sir Twitalot to think it is really funny that we have classified it
as something horrible and made it illegal, etc.

Because if it just grows - and it doesn't need to be made with allergy pills like meth - it means it was probably in the garden of eden even.

And that said, certainly we need our POT TWEETS by those who like POT TREATS.

One of them that Sir Twitalot enjoys is HEMPNEWS from Canada.

THEIR BIO

Breaking news on HEMP and Medical Marijuana- the 'original' Green Economy -environmental and human friendly-over 25,000 uses incl. food, medicine, fuel, paper...

It's informative and clean and not filled with teenage diatribes about their p's and teachers.

Follow the tweets. They are the ones with the smoke coming off them.

Fave Random Tweet July 22

LinduhGarcia

It burns when u use a clean nostril.


Sir Twitalot understands completely Linduh, perhaps, or maybe not.

This is my fave random tweet of the day because one immediately thinks that Ms. Linduh
is describing some sort of illegal drug use and that may or may not be true.

And that is the joy of the tweet.


What is left unsaid.


Or unsmelled.


Or unsniffed.

Fave Random Tweet July 21

Angel_Muller

Que isso ???? Chewbacca!!!??

Sir Twitalot sings the praises of the sweet genius of images on Twitter.

They allow us to share with those who speak Portuguese, and they to share with us.

We can figure out what Angel's two word exclamation-interrogatory means, and we can share the joy in the absurdity of this hirsute artistry shown in the picture.
What the hell? Is this Chewbacca?

All via our fave random tweet of the day.

So give thanks, as Sir T. does, for the Angel_Muller
in which she shares this post Jenny Craig image of Chewbacca,
as he tries to get new roles in Hollywood.

And enjoy this shareback of a baby Chewbacca image on
the link below.

BABY CHEWBACCA

AP Sportswriter reduced to reporting on Tweets!

Retweet? No Tweetpeat!

Sir Twitalot has noticed a rather sad trend in sportswriting these days.

Rather than keen analysis or in-depth interview, we are getting a lot of sports news that includes
the re-typing of athletes' tweets. (Of course they do include the "sic" notices so we know that they actually re-typed versus cut-and-pasted it.)

That is why Sir Twitalot refers to this as a Tweetpeat, versus a retweet. In honor of Pat Riley's ridiculous trademarking that term, Sir Twitalot gives you TWEETPEAT as open source nomenclature.

NBA ARTICLE BY JON KRAWCZYNSKI, AP Sports Writer


Should we accept this as all we need to know about the situation from these players? Granted, most have learned to parse their words for the media, but if the media is going to merely re-type tweets, what do we need them for?

Granted there was not enough time for in-depth analysis, but tweetpeating as reporting needs to be questioned.

Twitter - 48 million a month! Kicks Bing's Butt

An interesting article in Advertising Age.

LINK TO TWITTER'S AMAZING MEDIA COVERAGE ARTICLE

This is not to say that people are spending 48 million a month on Twitter
but that it is the PR value by all the media talking about.

FROM ARTICLE

Twitter received almost 3 billion impressions -- 2.73 billion, to be exact -- in the past month, a time period that doesn't even include the frenzied weeks in April in which Oprah and Ellen weighed in on the micro-blogging service. TV contributed to 57% of the PR value, newspapers 37% and magazines 5%. Incidentally, Fox News bested CNN in terms of total PR value delivered by its Twitter mentions, although CNN dropped the name more often.

Fave Random Tweet July 20

rationalbehavio

I have a monkey stuck in wax-need to get him out; had him out in the sun for 3 days; tried the microwave. Now going to soak him in hot water

Well Sir Twitalot sometimes just gets down on his knees and is grateful to the tweeter when he gets a random tweet like this.

Golden.

What does Sir Twitalot really need to do to analyze this tweet by rationalbehavio ?
Nothing.

He can just envision it.

One can wonder how you get a monkey, or any simian, stuck in wax, for sure.

And Sir Twitalot can ponder the need for a good pair of clippers to cut the poor withering mammal from the wax.

And sure, we can both imagine the monkey getting fed and watered while in the sun.

BUT THE MICROWAVE!!!

Sure, we can understand putting cats in there.
They dry quickly.









But monkeys are made to cook, not be cooked!

Of course, Monkeys also like baths.










And this one shall certainly need one after rationalbehavio is through with him.

But anyone you look at this monkey, Sir Twitalot is grateful to this Homo Twitteriens for providing us with our fave random tweet of July 20!

Elizabeth Taylor - Sore but Intact!

While the title of this blog post could very well be the herald of Acting Legend Elizabeth Taylor's transcendent debut in the San Fernando Valley's Porn Industry - it, sadly, is not.

But it is a global FAVE RANDOM TWEET for the tweeting of Elizabeth Taylor!

It seems Dame Elizabeth has taken to tweeting, and she as just letting us know that she had received some sort of invasive test at the hospital, which occurred during the Michael Jackson Death Race 2009!

If you have forgotten, please remember that E.T. was a bestest friend of Michael. as well as Rock Hudson, and of course Richard Burton, and black horses.




DameElizabeth


I'm home from the hospital sore, but intact. Of course I'm still grieving for Michael...I always will.




While Sir Twitalot doth appreciate the fact that Dame Elizabeth chose not to participate in the maudlin Staples Center dog and pony show,


I've been asked to speak at the Staples Center. I cannot be part of the public whoopla.


Sir Twitalot is fascinated by the fact that the woman who carried the mantle of cultural icon, serial divorcee, acting talent extraordinaire, Hollywood royalty when there was such a thing, has found herself tweeting!!! And creating a neologism in Whoopla! That is more than hoopla, it is WHOOPLA! And in fact is was, that ceremony opened a case of WHOOP-arse on LA!

And Sir Twitalot wonders what is sore but still intact?

Still despite her soreness and addition to the English language, Elizabeth Taylor's pure tweeting (imagine using that phrase in a sentence even 5 years ago) put us in touch with her honest pain when the King of Pop passed.


I will always love Michael from the depth of my being and nothing can separate us.


Although my grief over Michael could not be any deeper, I am not on suicide watch as some of the cheaper "rags" would have you believe.



I can't imagine life without him. But I guess with God's help I'll learn.


There is no doubt in Sir Twitalot's mind that she was in deep grief.

But as a side note, it is interesting to read Liz's earlier tweets from before MJ's exited his corpus to return to Our Heavenly Music Producer.


Life without earrings is empty!



Dear Fellow Twitterers: Thank you for your opinions on my new perfume's name. VIOLET EYES won hands-down.


I think it's terrible for the California govt to retract the law on Gay Marriage after they made it legal. You can't treat people that way!

They show a constancy to Elizabeth Taylor that I believe is both admirable and endearing.
She is still a vocal opponent for gay rights, as she has been since the days of Rock Hudson and AIDS. She is still selling perfume because she knows you can never smell too good, but you can smell bad. And she still has a light hearted feminine sense of humor.

Now Sir Twitalot is certain that Liz is having her trained assistant tweet for her, because that is what assistants do, but we are still happy that Liz is tweeting. For all those years the "rags" wrote rumors and lies about her, when all she was doing behind closed mansion doors left her sore but intact, she now has a way, with her final breaths this lifetime, to speak directly with her fans about it.

Fave Random Tweet July 18

BliNkOnEkAtEtWO

This morning my new shower poofy felt like I was rubbing a porcupine's ass all over my body.


Sir Twitalot offers many thanks to BliNkOnEkAtEtWo
for her fine tweet today.

First off, Sir Twitalot gives props to this tweeter for mashing up her name with the name of a pop punk band. Usually puns make Sir Twitalot's ears hemorrhage and his intestines empty out, but this is a twist of lemon away from the pun, so Sir Twitalot approves.

But now, let's get to the tweet and why Sir Twitalot likes it.

Simple. It relates an experience, as many tweets do, but it is not a bland description of that experience. Too many tweets are filled with the mundane, the bland, the who-gives-a-phuck that you ate pancakes with syrup!!!

But this tweet has some metaphor, a metaphor that is not cliche' - I think because so few people have rubbed a porcupine's ass all over the body.



We can only sit in awe of BliNkOnEkAtEtWo and the fact that she has done this before and has the experience to relate it as a metaphot. Cause that is one mean loofah!




And this tweet then leads us to wonder, in what condition is her skin in now? Bleeding? Scarred?

The power of this metaphor, while not unique in books such as Exfoliating in the Wilderness is special to the Tweetness, and we appreciate it.

Finally, there is the word "poofy" which is used here as a noun and not an adjective. Sir Twitalot finds that amusing, but pauses to consider if poofy is the new "scrunchy" when that adjective became the noun for a certain type of hair tie. And Sir Twitalot has just missed that.









Anyway you rub it, hard or soft, this was our Fave Random Tweet of the day! Congrats Miss Blink 1 Katie 2!